ForumForum Games ► Look Mom, I Died!
They were after some other guy and they trample over you on the way. You get sentenced to 8 weeks of electric chair for obstruction of justice.

A deadly space lazer is primed for your exact location
  
In priming the laser, they fry the system, causing the orbital thrusters to fail. The entire orbiting weapon station starts falling to Earth. You think nothing of it because you didn't even know a laser was pointing at you, for you were taking a casual stroll through a lovely park, with flowers all around. A shadow starts to lightly cascade over the path, allowing a lovely cool breeze to sweep you away from your consciousness. You continue walking as the shadow starts to become darker and more defined. Someone starts screaming and others follow but you imagine it to be a group of friends scaring each other, perhaps even an act, or a performance. You then realize it is unusually dark, and wonder if a storm is rolling over. Looking up, you stand there terrified, as you process the structure rapidly falling from the sky, and only have a few seconds to turn and run before-

You and the entire park are crushed.

Anyways, so you play Roblox and realize you owe a lot of debt. You hear a knocking on the door and go to answer it, while the loanshark grunt pumps his shotgun...
  
The loanshark is an actual shark, and since he is out of water, he collapses and dies in front of you. You panic, and try to hide the body, because if people associate you with the dead shark, the shark activists will be all over you. You drag it into your backyard, where you have a woodchipper. You think you are in the clear, You put the dead shark in, and a few logs to make it not suspicious. You go inside, and hear another knock on your door. Its a shark activist. Hopefully its just a door to door awareness visit, and they dont know suspect that you were involved with the death of a shark. While talking to the shark activist, trying to end the conversation politely, you accidently reveal that you just saw a shark die. The activisdt picks up the shotgun that was still laying on the floor and kills you

You ate some poisoned candy
  
you choke on the candy

you're walking on a frozen lake and it breaks
  
You come out of a cooler and realize you are in a Superbowl beer commercial. You die of capitalism.

You start walking towards someone, and they walk back at you. You are in a Jojo reference.
  
They were trying to stop you from walking out in front of a speeding car.

You are trapped under a lot of rubble, and are losing consciousness.
  
No one notices you, and a bulldozer pushes you off into a cliff. For a moment, you are freed from your tomb of detritus only to immediately be crushed by it all over again.

Someone has swapped your toothbrush for poisonous cactus. You just started brushing.
  
You feel pain, drop the toothbrush on the neighborhood stray cat, and assuming you are attacking him, jumps on you and scratches the hell out of you, causing you to die of blood loss.

You are looking up at a construction site, and notice a steel beam has been dropped by a crane and is plummeting toward you.
  
You are swift to dodge the beam, and it slams into the ground, knocking you back a distance. Afterwards, the beam's parents approach their son who has just fallen to his death. They stare at his corpse, surrounded by concrete, denting the surface beneath him, and just stand there. Then they slowly turn their gaze to you. You, on all fours, trying to pick up your glasses after what just happened. They look at you and they know what they must do. They climb up on the crane, and jump off at precisely the location you will be within five seconds. You stand stunned as the parents of the fallen beam cover the sky as they quickly advance to your height. They fall on you, and they crush you. Four things died that day.

You are walking your dog when you step on a crack in the sidewalk.
  
Nothing happens when you step on the crack, to your surprise. Then, you get an urgent call from your mother. Her back, it was broken. You know it was you who did it. You broke your mother's back, after you stepped on the crack. But, you don't tell anyone. You keep it a secret, for years and years. But, one day, you let it slip. Now, your mother knows that you are the reason she can barely walk. She kills you, out of pure hatred of what you've done.

You're driving in the rain at night, as your car begins to hydroplane.
  
Because you are practically a god at driving, you control the car and eventually slide to a stop. This of course, only occurred after sliding at high speed through an entire farmers market, committing about 57 counts of vehicular manslaughter. How horrible. To death with you.

You wake up and realize you're in Dark Souls.
  
The player ragequits and deletes the game, and you are erased.

There's a zombie on your lawn.
  
The zombie is just a hologram, and you are sniped from behind

you just swallowed a c4
  
You are dishonorably discharged for eating C4 while on deployment. However on the flight back, security notices it's still in your system and they shoot you 72 times, as is standard procedure.

Someone put a highly deadly tarantula in your mailbox
  
but its okay, because who uses mail anymore

the building you are in is rigged to blow
  
you fall and lose all of your blood

you are on the twin towers and you see a plane heading your way
  
You slip and fall while doing your office duties, and hit your head too hard.

You're being lowered into a pit of hangry crabs
  
However, the crabs are so hangry they start eating each other out of rage! And then themselves in a sort of paradoxical ritual!! Now there are no crabs left. But you're also feeling a little hangry...

You are in the middle of a roller coaster ride when one of the wheels in your cart snaps off.
caveat said:
but its okay, because who uses mail anymore

LAME. Never throw something like that EVER again. That was INCREDIBLY lame.
  
get's ninjad :(
  
In response to Probot's deleted message:
You're standing around, walking along your predefined patrol route. Life is nice. Until you hear footsteps walk up to you, and the next thing you know you have a bullet in the head. The last thing you hear is an Australian man answering a pager before walking off with three other people.

You have just gotten ninja'd, and the whole world noticed.
  
Double ninja?

ignore
  
Double whammy.
  
my guy broke the game lol
  
You bash your head against the screen in embarrassment, but you die of electrocution and glass shards to the skull.

Your forgot to pay your existence bill this month.
  
your soul gets eaten by your own children

you are about to get impaled by a 13 foot katana
  
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