ForumForum Games ► Useless Superpowers
Come up with a useless superpower. The user who posts after you will think up a practical application (or really any use) for that power and then choice a useless power for the next person.

Example
Person A: Ability to make any paper product adhesive
Person B: Sticking paper money to the ground and watching people try to pick it up for your own amusement.

The Ability to change the color of your internal organs at will.
  
With an internal camera you can show the doctor exactly where it hurts

The power to know when there is exactly 16,815,675,227,948 of something
  
Star counting in certain parts of the sky, maybe? That's such a big number!

Ability to tell what day of the week any given person was born on.
  
Fortune telling and astrology! Nothing screams medium like not knowing someone's birthday but knowing when they were born.

Ability to flatten out any paper that was previously crumpled.
  
It would let you fit your bills into those machines that reject them because of tiny folds.

Ability to understand what worms are thinking (but not communicate back)
  
You could determine more easily when an earthquake is coming.

The ability to copy another person's form when they do jumping jacks.
  
(This. This is my game.)

Power to see every germ in vibrant color.

X-ray vision, except you always see through everything, so you see nothing.
  
You can easily avoid looking at hideous things.

The power to see things as if you were a millimeter closer
  
Power to make all of your dishes done, it takes three hours to activate.

Power to tell the exact time a fruit is at it's ripest time.
  
(you have to give a situation where the preceding superpower is useful. For example: Seeing something as if you were a millimeter closer is useful if you're a millimeter away from the object)

Make a killing in the grocery industry. You can predict market trends, buy fruit at the right time, and fill a demand for fresh, ripe fruit.

The ability to type the word "Porpoise" instantly.
  
When you need to fill someone else's terminal with spammy junk text.

The ability to produce small, wet paper cups of every color, save orange.
  
With some automation, you can make a killing selling fresh water and paper pulp to disadvantaged countries.

The ability to control your own hands.
  
It sure would make writing papers easier.

The ability to blink in specific patterns
  
You could make millions teaching people to communicate non-verbally with eye codes.

The ability to know when other people have forgotten to do something but you won't know exactly what it is they've forgotten to do.
  
You'd be great at one of those game shows. "Too bad you forgot that thing! Darn. Next contestant, please!"

To be able to snore in musical pitches, but only when you're sleeping alone
  
You could write songs in your sleep!

The ability to tell when someone else has a superpower.
  
You will never second guess a person again.

The ability to reach into your sock drawer or hamper and find the matching sock immediately.
  
... This isn't useless. It's a completely legitimate superpower that I would pay money to have.

Moving on. The power to be apathetic.
  
You could totally use this for a job as a white girl therapist.

The power to drink water just a little bit faster than your friends.
  
Beer has water in it, so you'd be the life of the partehz.

The ability to communicate with ducks but not have them talk back to you
  
You become a force for good, telepathically warning ducks when there are nearby duck hunters...

How about the ability to eat endlessly (as in an infinite amount)...
  
Dude, food endurance competition.

The power to calculate the speed of falling pebbles in your head.
  
Oh you know those, learn to be better at math videos? You could do that with physics and scam people out of 19.99 for the DVD.

The ability to identity the origins of people's accents.
  
You can be one of those jerks at the airport who screen for threats.


the power to make someone who is looking at you think you winked at them when you didn't
  
You could get a job as a second-line defense for a political figure so they never look dumb in front of other dignitaries.

The ability to always know what Jim Carrey is thinking.
  
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