Two Cans & String

{ "thread_id": "11399", "posts": [ { "id": "1150586", "time": "1623986797", "html": "oh hey i passed 3500 and i didn't even realize it<br /><br />anyways the first time i ever had a girlfriend was in 6th or 7th grade (i think it was 6th)<br /><br />she dumped me after 3 days for kyle<br /><br />we hugged exactly once in our entire relationship<br /><br />that's the end of the story i still have her number but haven't texted her since", "user": "titanlord237" }, { "id": "1150587", "time": "1623987286", "html": "some fun facts about her:<br /><br /><ul><li>she watched stranger things on netflix (i didn't)</li><li>her favorite animal was a zebra</li><li><span style=\"text-decoration:line-through;\">she's kind of a bitch, if you think about it</span></li></ul><br />*sniff* and she broke my heart, man", "user": "titanlord237" }, { "id": "1150588", "time": "1623987381", "html": "another fun fact i was completely unemotionally invested in the relationship so i was kind of a douche to her<br /><br />she had asked me after recess if i wanted to date her and i said yes against my better judgement<br /><br />i had never spoken to her up until that point<br /><br />haha i poked fun at her a lot so it's probably no surprise our "relationship" lasted less than a week<br /><br />edit: come to think of it i'm not entirely sure if she dumped me, or i dumped her<br /><br />hmm it was kind of a long time ago", "user": "titanlord237" }, { "id": "1150590", "time": "1623988063", "html": "A heartbreaking ex story. I find it interesting that kids in elementary and middle school would be "boyfriend and girlfriend" after literally never talking to each other. Like, was it just the cool thing to do?", "user": "currentnathan" }, { "id": "1150594", "time": "1623988327", "html": "i don't know<br /><br />initially this was supposed to be a greentext but i chickened out because it wouldn't be authentic if i didn't use ableist and homophobic slurs and other cringy slanguage and i wasn't comfortable doing that<br /><br />but it's worth mentioning i was a loner loser at the time with literally zero friends in that class and was alone the whole time so i was pretty snotnosed and fucking<br /><br />horny's not the right word but<br /><br />i guess desperate for a relationship<br /><br />edit: i'm not making a very good case for myself, am i?<br /><br /><color value="#ffffff">good. i'm glad.</color><br /><br />edit: since i'm clearly very comfortable with giving out cringy facts about my past (that someone might look me up and find where i live and my life is in danger) why not share two more facts about this relationship? a funny one and a very creepy one.<br /><br />the funny one first<br />she said she liked zebras as her favorite animal because they were skinny because they were vegetarians<br />kind of sad<br /><br />now the creepy one<br />i got a hersheys kiss in my lunch that day i walked up to her during our concurrent chem class after lunch and was like "wanna kiss" cause i was fishing for a reaction from her<br />she was like "EW NO" and i pulled out the hersheys and she looked relieved<br /><br />god i'm an asshole<ul style=\"color:#f00;\"><li>\"#ffffff\" is not a valid color name.</li></ul>", "user": "titanlord237" }, { "id": "1150598", "time": "1623988859", "html": "<quote>god i'm an asshole</quote><br /><br /><span style=\"font-style:italic;\">Were</span> an asshole.<br /><br />Edit: Honestly though, don't dwell on stupid shit you did as a tween. I remember being that kid who wore nothing but baggy sweatpants and argued about how much better Samsung is than Apple and how PUBG is better than Fortnite and anyone who disagrees is a <span style=\"font-weight:bold;\">FUCKING NORMIE.</span><br /><br />I'm glad I've changed.", "user": "currentnathan" }, { "id": "1150602", "time": "1623989081", "html": "JIGGLYPUFF<br /><img src=\"https://i.stack.imgur.com/a4ar5.gif\" alt=\"\" /><br />currentnathan i'm trying to come up with the most damning things i've done in my entire life atm the moment i've drawn a blank either i'm repressing those memories or i'm literally perfect", "user": "titanlord237" }, { "id": "1150604", "time": "1623989235", "html": "<span style=\"text-decoration:line-through;\">Titanlord237, you're perfect to me. <3</span><br /><br />JK nobody is perfect.<br /><br /><div style=\"margin:20px; background-image:url(/images/light.png);\"><div style=\"border:1px solid #888; padding:5px;\"><a href=\"/users/titanlord237\">Titanlord237</a> said:</div><div style=\"border:1px solid #888; padding:20px;\">"EW NO"</div></div><br />Hits hard.", "user": "currentnathan" }, { "id": "1150610", "time": "1623989448", "html": "bro but that was the creepiest motherfreaking thing i bet she experienced in her whole god damn life<br /><br />we were like 12 years old<br /><br />edit: holy crap we were literally 12 years old i think she was slightly older than me but damn<br /><br />i might even have been 11 or some shit back then<br /><br />possibly even 10<br /><br />now i feel like a pervert", "user": "titanlord237" }, { "id": "1150617", "time": "1623989786", "html": "It seems you only really started the relationship because you needed <span style=\"font-style:italic;\">someone</span> to talk to.", "user": "currentnathan" }, { "id": "1150619", "time": "1623989869", "html": "nope i started the relationship because i asked kyle for a hug and he said no and he brought [name redacted] over (shit i almost accidentally said her name) and she gave me a hug and about an hour later she asked if i wanted to date her<br /><br />i was weird as fuck back then i was spending every other class period in the counselor's office<br /><br />and that's not even that much of an exaggeration!", "user": "titanlord237" }, { "id": "1150620", "time": "1623989963", "html": "Kyle's a shit for turning you down.", "user": "currentnathan" }, { "id": "1150622", "time": "1623990054", "html": "i'm distancing my current self from my past self because if not that would imply that i'm still weird and i'm not weird i swearrrr", "user": "titanlord237" }, { "id": "1150623", "time": "1623990100", "html": "Rough mate", "user": "samsung23" }, { "id": "1150625", "time": "1623990179", "html": "<div style=\"margin:20px; background-image:url(/images/light.png);\"><div style=\"border:1px solid #888; padding:5px;\"><a href=\"/users/titanlord237\">Titanlord237</a> said:</div><div style=\"border:1px solid #888; padding:20px;\">i'm distancing my current self from my past self</div></div><br /><br />A lot of us are. I think it's safe to say everyone's cringey as a 10-12 year old.", "user": "currentnathan" }, { "id": "1150627", "time": "1623990409", "html": "Is this just 1 person talking to themself?", "user": "chetmanly" }, { "id": "1150629", "time": "1623990453", "html": "oh god i don't come off as a serial killer, do i?<br /><br />DO I", "user": "titanlord237" }, { "id": "1150630", "time": "1623990542", "html": "<div style=\"margin:20px; background-image:url(/images/light.png);\"><div style=\"border:1px solid #888; padding:5px;\"><a href=\"/users/chetmanly\">Chet Manly</a> said:</div><div style=\"border:1px solid #888; padding:20px;\">Is this just 1 person talking to themself?</div></div><br /><br />Are you implying that we are all alts?", "user": "currentnathan" }, { "id": "1150631", "time": "1623990606", "html": "It's hard to tell anymore.", "user": "coldfrost" }, { "id": "1150633", "time": "1623990651", "html": "hello coldfrost!", "user": "titanlord237" }, { "id": "1150634", "time": "1623990692", "html": "<div style=\"margin:20px; background-image:url(/images/light.png);\"><div style=\"border:1px solid #888; padding:5px;\"><a href=\"/users/coldfrost\">Coldfrost</a> said:</div><div style=\"border:1px solid #888; padding:20px;\">It's hard to tell anymore.</div></div><br /><br /><span style=\"font-weight:bold;\">IT COULD BE ANY ONE OF US!</span>", "user": "currentnathan" }, { "id": "1150636", "time": "1623990792", "html": "i like to keep my BS quarantined to chiefly threads i create<br /><br />so if it's melodrama you're after, one of these threads is a good place to start<br /><br />edit: i'm not cringey i swear", "user": "titanlord237" }, { "id": "1150637", "time": "1623990829", "html": "<img src=\"https://pbs.twimg.com/media/E3bNzDQUcAADW2p.jpg\" alt=\"\" />", "user": "samsung23" }, { "id": "1150640", "time": "1623990920", "html": "<div style=\"margin:20px; background-image:url(/images/light.png);\"><div style=\"border:1px solid #888; padding:5px;\"><a href=\"/users/titanlord237\">Titanlord237</a> said:</div><div style=\"border:1px solid #888; padding:20px;\">i'm not cringey i swear</div></div><br /><br />Only at night, it seems.", "user": "currentnathan" }, { "id": "1150641", "time": "1623990954", "html": "UGH FINE I GUESS I'LL GO TO SLEEP THEN<br /><br />jeez", "user": "titanlord237" } ], "users": { "titanlord237": { "name": "Titanlord237", "key": "titanlord237", "url": "/users/titanlord237", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/25014.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "9134" }, "currentnathan": { "name": "Currentnathan", "key": "currentnathan", "url": "/users/currentnathan", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/27282.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "1001" }, "samsung23": { "name": "Samsung23", "key": "samsung23", "url": "/users/samsung23", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/27967.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "2075" }, "chetmanly": { "name": "Chet Manly", "key": "chetmanly", "url": "/users/chetmanly", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/25770.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "393" }, "coldfrost": { "name": "Coldfrost", "key": "coldfrost", "url": "/users/coldfrost", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/6053.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "8104" } }, "page_num": 1, "locked": 0, "total_pages": 4 }

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