Two Cans & String

{ "thread_id": "8241", "posts": [ { "id": "908109", "time": "1473862058", "html": "Fire fire fire<br />\nfire fire fire fire fire<br />\nfire fire fier", "user": "omegnal64" }, { "id": "908125", "time": "1473867352", "html": "<span style=\"text-decoration:underline;\">Dear babycarrot<br />\n</span><br />\nBabycarrot<br />\n<br />\nSmall<br />\n<br />\nUgly<br />\n<br />\nLives in the shadow of the carrot<br />\n<br />\nBabycarrot.<br />\n<br />\n(This one made the rounds online and was said to be by Ibsen, but I'm like 99% sure that isn't true. Still felt suited to this thread.)", "user": "fickling" }, { "id": "908135", "time": "1473869642", "html": "<div style=\"margin:20px; background-image:url(/images/light.png);\"><div style=\"border:1px solid #888; padding:5px;\"><a href=\"/users/lazro/\">Lazro</a> said:</div><div style=\"border:1px solid #888; padding:20px;\">Fun fact of the day:<br />\nHaiku did not have to fit<br />\n5-7-5</div></div><br />\nit's snowing on mt. fuji", "user": "eric616" }, { "id": "909160", "time": "1474395480", "html": "Smileys make me feel smiley<br />\nsmiley smiley smiley<br />\nI am smiling smililey", "user": "omegnal64" }, { "id": "909161", "time": "1474395906", "html": "You bet your ass my ear flippin itches, <br />\nIt's irritating me like a pack full of bitches<br />\n<br />\n<br />\nBoom boom<br />\nI go vroom vroom<br />\nTakin off on my broom broom", "user": "guessillseeyouinhell" }, { "id": "909302", "time": "1474467530", "html": "the ayy lmaos are in my head<br />im in bed", "user": "omegnal64" }, { "id": "909835", "time": "1475067605", "html": "Throat infection <br /><br />Snuffles<br /><br />Grape sized loogies sailing<br /><br />Everywhere<br /><br />In toiling and in sink<br /><br />My hack resounds<br /><br />Disease abounds<br /><br />Why the fuck was I excited for Fall.", "user": "sundog" }, { "id": "909933", "time": "1475158796", "html": "Here is a poem I wrote about r/politics<br /><br />Ahem.<br /><br />(removed)", "user": "omegnal64" }, { "id": "909938", "time": "1475161205", "html": "Unpronounceable:<br />//////////", "user": "lazro" }, { "id": "909949", "time": "1475169404", "html": "The Jorgun Blorgun translated so many times idek<br /><br />Joerg Blorgun Zak Mytty<br /><br />Vie clusterfluxer Moogerfooger are "Blorguns Jerg" and "legs"<br />I significance of e inveterate neighbors "If the fetus.<br />"Narrated Maymays" and "Do not doubt it Aron ritual" Danke.<br />Joerg blorgun po\u010dnaa to wear slinging and profitable underground<br />Whippersnapper Dootering $ Ruthin. Jas blorguns Jorg<br />Allow me here to be photographed are four three heart stomach. e<br />Sega Follow me, "I am the door" smashed. I'm prepared<br />No Stahp "beatnik coffee around in the washing-Davey, the last angle at Jones.<br />No one wants Joerg Blorgun. So stahp to "Ada<br />Boy m'young spa night, jas sayings story for some it will never to forget, and<br />I go to this device.<br /><br />1420 "I am part of the terms of the players moite<br />Negoviot younger brother during many sea Minimooger<br />Relief washed off. He said: "Loch Ness Monster"<br />This is a bad boy smee\u0161e said that, it resumes sailing<br />His life story. Zastanavme for the moment "sea port<br />Collecting candle part of the British merchant island Isla.<br />It has a priority on sewn services, and we agreed we Jerg Blorgun.<br />It is more than 69 kilometers and bolidot shaking attack nasiot Castle<br />Kaufman was fear that the cancellation of life. That he wanted to get back in Jerg. go prasav<br />He stirs return medium, and not the money, "said the<br />Didi trees. "I can not go SETIV that they collect<br />Kaufman and 300 rates below the surface of the stone! A "Tell me"<br />I a'int gave each tree Didi Monster of Loch Ness! "However, the current one is only a hour<br />Swimming is understood that zabavuvaat to me, "the Loch Ness".<br />Well jas stole Minster realized mojata cancer! Lost, but jas Jorg<br />blorgun, i can not last for more, a jas hit blorgun Roger Joerg cancer. "<br />Danke gift celerbrating Sekogas closes five. "<br />Gutentag and Tua.", "user": "omegnal64" }, { "id": "910112", "time": "1475274534", "html": "Rain, rain,<br />Go the fuck away,<br />Little Frosties <br />Want to play<br />Music and march<br />Without getting soaking wet<br />For the third goddamn day in a row<br />Thank you very much<br />Bye", "user": "coldfrost" }, { "id": "925853", "time": "1485962967", "html": "aaaaaaaaaaa<br /><br /><br />savenyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa<br /><br />animanesewaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa<br /><br />as you may see<br />I don't know the lyrics to circle of life. . . bee<br /><br />I'm trying to rhyme<br />just give me some time<br /><br />Hakunamatata<br />Stop typing I oughta", "user": "arale" }, { "id": "926035", "time": "1485991864", "html": "McGonagall was famous as a bad poet<br />Although it appeared he did not know it.<br />He wrote hundreds of poetic gems<br />which included some very unusual strategems.<br />So please remember this bard of Dundee<br />and read some of his poems when you are taking tea.", "user": "diav" }, { "id": "927624", "time": "1486999975", "html": "I love vogon poetry very much<br />It tried to kill mr. dent and such<br />For some reason this poem actually rhymes<br />Whatever", "user": "arale" }, { "id": "996777", "time": "1540366037", "html": "I just wrote <a href=\"https://twocansandstring.com/forum/games/gotopost/996776/#post996776\">this terrible thing</a> and it just came so naturally, should I be worried?", "user": "gws" }, { "id": "996782", "time": "1540377122", "html": "Tuesday morning about Didbury<br />the chemical fog showed into<br />when man jumps the towers<br />left big messy", "user": "diav" }, { "id": "997656", "time": "1540754740", "html": "Yours and mine<br /><br />I sleep, it's time<br />the night goes, yes<br />but where, who cares<br />when it makes way for another tomorrow<br />that drips and drips and drags itself <br />and eats alive bird feet and stems <br />of plants, among which I no longer <br />pour myself.<br /><br />What a pain, my god<br />I am tried in absentia<br />in absentia of you, you bastard.<br />and so it is Autumn again,<br />and so I see the season of death,<br />agitated, in front of my eyes,<br />like a costume rehearsal for<br />winter<br />fucking white slumber eternal, <br />hiatus flanked by springs, no more.<br /><br />The bastards speak of gold<br />like deranged prospectors<br />in leaves, in hearts, in moods,<br />in the eyes of schoolchildren who<br />with pearly incisors, <br />bite at the fruit of life and <br />opportunity. Such graceful creatures, unaware<br />that what lies in the leaf-bed,<br />romantically and affected,<br />are the birds <br />and the insects <br />and the sun<br />and all life, dying. <br /><br />And I, a philosopher and a scholar, <br />and a gentleman of sorts,<br />lie with them, accepting, yet bitter,<br />eating my heart out, garnished,<br />of course, with the destructive phantasies of the could have beens<br />of my mammalian brain. What ridiculous self<br />is left can witness itself - <br />I, troubled, naked, defective,<br />a moribund, the hands shaking and grappling<br />the remains of the sandcastle of<br />what was yours and mine.", "user": "demotivationalted" }, { "id": "998442", "time": "1541179276", "html": "I did not write this poem, but rather found it stuck to a tree near where I live. Backstory: Politicians want to remove forest close to where I live to build more houses. (Relatively tall houses at that.) Activists have rallied and are hoping to make the forest a nature reserve. One of these activists has written the poem below.<br /><br />Disclaimer: I really hope the forest will be made a nature reserve because it's a good forest. I'm not mocking the activist movement as such, I just think the poem is rather bad. <br /><br /><br /><span style=\"font-weight:bold;\">A poem dedicated to the threatened forests in Eriksberg*</span><br /><br />Do you know which fate<br />maybe awaits you?<br /><br />Is that why your<br />majestic crowns<br />sway so sadly in the autumn wind?<br /><br />You see us walk on the paths<br />your branches cry for help.<br /><br />Powerless we walk on<br />carrying a heart-wrenching sorrow:<br />what if your lives cannot be saved?<br /><br />Unbearable!<br /><br />When you step into a hospitable<br />tree family's living room<br />do you bring the chainsaw?<br /><br />They have lived here for several hundred years<br />we have only existed for a short time<br />they have a bigger right<br />to the place than we.<br /><br />Defenceless they cannot flee<br />from a massacre<br />so we must protect them!<br /><br />(*Eriksberg is the neighbourhood where the forest is.)", "user": "jaxxie" }, { "id": "999193", "time": "1541465339", "html": "I am choosing to believe that the poem suffers from a string of bad translations, and that once it was a good poem. <br /><br />Please let me live in my dream world Jaxx. I have little else.", "user": "devery" }, { "id": "999200", "time": "1541470131", "html": "The harsh, cold wind is howling<br /> Much like a whirlling storm.<br /> In-<br /> Side.<br />Me could ne'er contain it.<br />Heaven knows,<br />Me have tried.<br /> Ne'er let them in.<br /> Do not let them see.<br />Thou be'est the aproved young woman<br />Thou are obligated to be.<br />Concelest, ne'er feel<br />Ne'er alow them to know.<br /> Well,<br /> ...as of now, they know.", "user": "purplelover" }, { "id": "999580", "time": "1541636706", "html": "*not written by me*<br /><br />Haikus are easy,<br />But sometimes they don't make sense.<br />Refrigerator.", "user": "vampireflutist" }, { "id": "999810", "time": "1541715811", "html": "Allow it to proceed!<br />allow it to advance!<br />Methinks me can not detain it,<br />anymore.<br />allow it to progress!<br />allow it to pass!<br />Thou must turnest away and forcely shut the door!<br />I am apathetic! towards what they are soon to declaire about me.<br />I will let the temptest rage on!<br />The frost ne'er troubbled me, at any rate.", "user": "purplelover" }, { "id": "999823", "time": "1541723205", "html": "(That is exactly the right thing to post here.)", "user": "gws" }, { "id": "999833", "time": "1541724904", "html": "Roses are Red,<br />Violets are Blue;<br />In some slavic languages this poem rhymes<br />Better", "user": "kylljoy" }, { "id": "1000014", "time": "1541858989", "html": "That just sounds like one of Jean-Ralphio's raps.", "user": "jashagrees" } ], "users": { "omegnal64": { "name": "omegnal64", "key": "omegnal64", "url": "/users/omegnal64", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/4501.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "754" }, "fickling": { "name": "Fickling", "key": "fickling", "url": "/users/fickling", "avatar": "/images/white.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "25" }, "eric616": { "name": "Eric-616", "key": "eric616", "url": "/users/eric616", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/17124.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "2930" }, "guessillseeyouinhell": { "name": "GuessI'llSeeYouInHell", "key": "guessillseeyouinhell", "url": "/users/guessillseeyouinhell", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/3624.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "2120" }, "sundog": { "name": "Sundog", "key": "sundog", "url": "/users/sundog", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/3220.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "4907" }, "lazro": { "name": "Lazro", "key": "lazro", "url": "/users/lazro", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/13214.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "8955" }, "coldfrost": { "name": "Coldfrost", "key": "coldfrost", "url": "/users/coldfrost", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/20861.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "7587" }, "arale": { "name": "Arale", "key": "arale", "url": "/users/arale", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/15261.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "1969" }, "diav": { "name": "DIAV", "key": "diav", "url": "/users/diav", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/15553.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "15894" }, "gws": { "name": "gws", "key": "gws", "url": "/users/gws", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/20574.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "5050" }, "demotivationalted": { "name": "Demotivationalted", "key": "demotivationalted", "url": "/users/demotivationalted", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/3081.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "3949" }, "jaxxie": { "name": "jaxxie", "key": "jaxxie", "url": "/users/jaxxie", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/13511.png", "rankClass": "admin", "rankText": "Admin", "posts": "8396" }, "devery": { "name": "Devery", "key": "devery", "url": "/users/devery", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/21034.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "3238" }, "purplelover": { "name": "Purplelover", "key": "purplelover", "url": "/users/purplelover", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/20588.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "617" }, "vampireflutist": { "name": "#vampireflutist", "key": "vampireflutist", "url": "/users/vampireflutist", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/17948.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "1458" }, "kylljoy": { "name": "Kylljoy", "key": "kylljoy", "url": "/users/kylljoy", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/18680.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "3035" }, "jashagrees": { "name": "JashAgrees", "key": "jashagrees", "url": "/users/jashagrees", "avatar": "/uploads/drawn/1943.png", "rankClass": "civilian", "rankText": "", "posts": "4498" } }, "page_num": 3, "locked": 0, "total_pages": 4 }

All The Other Things:

There's a TCaS twitter thingamajig. I'm not sure why.